Bonding before birth
Bonding with you baby while she is in your womb is not only an exhilarating experience, but also excellent for your baby’s development.
Studies have shown that babies start to react to sound at around 24 weeks, so from three months pregnant onwards is a great time to interact with your baby.
Your baby’s favourite sound of all is your voice. She hears it through the air when you speak as it travels through your belly to her, and she also feels the vibrations of your voice through your body, so talk to her calmly all the time.
If you're not sure what to say, try reassuring your baby that she is loved; tell her your thoughts in a natural, honest way and try to be as positive as possible. Sit in a comfortable chair and gently sing to your baby, or play your favourite soothing tunes. Once your baby is born, she will respond to the tunes she recognises from her time in the womb. She may feel a sense of calm if you sit in the same chair listening to the same music.
Encourage your partner or any other children you have to talk and sing to your bump, as your baby will start to find those voices familiar and soothing too.
Some parents feel a connection to their baby as soon as it's conceived: lots of mothers report 'knowing' they are pregnant, long before the pregnancy test shows a positive result.
As your baby develops and you start to feel those first kicks, you'll probably begin to feel a strong connection to your baby. You'll notice the times when your baby kicks the most (after food, especially if it is sweet or spicy) or patterns in when it sleeps and is awake and active. Fathers may take a little longer to bond with their babies because, obviously, they are not feeling the baby kick and squirm inside them. But dads can of course talk to their baby, touch their partner's stomach and feel their baby moving or play their favourite music to the baby.
Studies have shown that babies who begin hearing at 18 weeks of pregnancy prefer classical music, or any music that mimics the mother's heartbeat of 60 beats per minute (lullabies are a good example of this type of music). Loud rock music won't harm your unborn child as long as it is not exposed to it ALL the time. This is because the amniotic fluid surrounding the baby basically amplifies the sound of music so keep very loud music to a minimum.
You'll be surprised at how instinctive you'll become when your baby is born, after all, you and your baby have lived side-by-side for nine months and even without thinking about it you are probably aware of when she likes to sleep, what makes her active (certain foods) and what she doesn't like (the midwife prodding your stomach!).
Your baby is learning from you while inside the womb, but you're also learning to respond to your baby. Once your baby is in the outside world, she'll mostly have eyes for mum, and studies show that newborns stare at their mother's faces longer than anyone else. She'll soon become familiar with your voice outside of the womb, and of your smell. Once she is born the bonding process doesn't stop but intensifies as you both grow and learn from each other.
Tips for bonding with your baby in the womb:
1) Talk to your baby as much as you can. You may feel silly talking to a little person you can't even see, but your baby can hear you and will be soothed by your voice.
2) Touch your stomach as much as you can, gently massage oil over your lower abdomen. This can help in two ways; by forming a connection to your baby by feeling her move in your tummy and also helping to prevent dreaded stretch marks!
3) You can also start to play games with your baby so when she kicks you, press your tummy and see if she kicks back. Encourage your partner to do the same.
4) Play music to your baby as much as possible - there is much research that shows that babies respond to the music they heard inside the womb once they are born.
5) Tell your baby how much you love her and how much you are looking forward to meeting her soon.